Nothing tests your life’s foundation like a disruption to the status quo. A disruption can be good or bad, but when life changes pace, it forces you to choose what is most important to you. These big life changes are where I have seen many people either step deeper into their faith in Jesus or, unfortunately, take a step back. I am writing this to encourage you to not step back but step forward when life changes, and for you to help others when others have changes in their life.

Disruptions could be things like a breakup, getting a new job, getting engaged, graduating from college, loss of a loved one, and many other things that force you to regroup.

James 1:2 tells us we should consider it a joy when we face trials, but why? That’s because they have the opportunity to grow us, but they also can weaken us. This is because we live in a contested space between God and the enemy. God wanting to form us spiritually and the devil trying to deform us spiritually. It is up to us to choose to walk by the Spirit so God can use it to grow us up in our faith. (Galatians 5:16-26)

Let The Right Priorities Control Your Time

The best way to see where your priorities currently are—not necessarily where they should be—is to look at where your time and money is spent. For your time, look at your calendar and screen time report. Then, for your money, look at your credit card or bank statement. Matthew 6:21 says, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” This is just as true for time as it is money. So as you look at where you are currently placing your money and time, ask yourself is that pointing towards a strong foundation in Christ or one of this world that will not weather the storm? (Matthew 7:24-27)

Now I know it is all God’s time and money, but He is trusting us to steward it well. (Matthew 25:14–30) So let’s get practical on how to be a good steward of your time. Stewarding time well will build a foundation to not just weather life’s disruptions, but to step forward in it and help others at the same time.

When to Start Being Good About Time Management?

Right now is the best time. Before we get into more of practically how to do this, I want to address why you should start setting up this framework now instead of later. 

Every life season ahead will be more busy than your current season. Life never slows down—in most situations—it always speeds up.

People often say I will do this once I do XYZ, but once that is complete you will have another thing on your plate. While there may be little slower points and you need to take advantage of those when they come, this is far from the norm. Rest when you can and use your time you do have now to set yourself and those affected by your time management up well for the future. 

Control Your Time Don’t Let Your Time Control You

One of the most common mistakes I see people make is letting their calendar tell them what to do instead of telling them what to do. This especially happens when people get new jobs or some other big life disruption happens. Disruptions could be good or bad, but they do change your status quo. 

When these disruptions happen, you are essentially handed a rock and you choose if you will put it into your life and what rock will be taken out to make room. If you decide to put the rock in your life, you also have to choose how and when you will put it into your life. Whenever you have a new rock that needs to go into your life, you must be very intentional in how you do that. I see far too many people take out the important rocks that should be their foundation and replace them with the rocks of work, school, sports, or some other thing that becomes the most important thing in their life. This is when knowing your priorities, assuming you have the right priorities, is essential. This allows you to leave the non-negotiable rocks and adjust the negotiable ones.

Personal Examples of Not Doing Handling a Life Change Well 

To be honest, I have not done this perfectly. When I transitioned from college to working full time, I was serving in 3 ministries and in a small group. All great things to do when I had more free time in college, but I tried to keep all of these on my plate because I loved each of them so much. This began to be too much for me pretty quickly and I was tired and not able to prioritize the right things. This came to a culmination after a long day when I was exhausted, and I fell asleep driving home and got into a car wreck. 

Thanks to God I was fine, but I learned a valuable lesson—which I share with you here. I choose to step back from one ministry and start pursuing working from home instead of going to the office, which is an hour away. Now I have more margin in my life to pursue spiritual formation while also helping others. I am not perfect at this, but am a lot more intentional with each life transition I face.

Example From a Friend Where it Hasn’t Ended Up Well

Unfortunately, this one currently isn’t going the right way yet, but I think it is important to tell both sides of where disruptions can take you. I have a dear friend of mine who was heavily invested in some of the same ministries and life building activities as me. He was doing all the right things, but when he got busy with school and busy with jobs after college, he put God farther and farther down the properties list. Meaning he went from being at church and serving every week to a few times a month, to a few times a year, to almost never. If you asked him, he would say he is a Christian, but I would tell you he isn’t born again.

Now you don’t have to go to church to be a Christian, but it sure does help. God meant for us to be in community so we can build others up and others can build us up. See, 1 Corinthians 14:26 and Proverbs 27:17. He slowly started hanging out more and more with people that led him astray and less and less with people who would point him toward Christ. No one is ever too far gone, and I pray that a disruption would point him towards Christ. (1 Timothy 1:15–16) Please pray for him as well and pray for those in your life that don’t know Christ.

What Are The Rocks, Gravel, and Sand in Your Life?

The rock, gravel, and sand represent how your time is spent. This is from a well-used analogy that helps us understand how to manage your priorities and time. In your life, you can break down everything you do into rocks, gravel, and sand. Rocks are things like church, family time, work, and other top priority things. You only can handle about 3-4 rocks. Gravel is less important but still valuable. These things typically take up less time but are still important, like working out. Then sand is the filler activities we do like watching TV and Social Media. 

Often we make the mistake of putting the sand in first, then gravel, and then the rocks. Doing it that way won’t work, because the order matters. If you put it in the right order, you will find you have time because the less important things have time to fit into the in-between moments that the rocks are too big for.

A tactic that has been life changing for me in work and personal life is time blocking. This is where you plan out all of your time at work and personal life for when you plan to do things in your time and what those things are. If your rocks aren’t on your calendar, they aren’t actually rocks.

Rocks, Gravel, and Sand Analogy

Recently, one of the pastors at my church, Pastor Kevin Myers at 12Stone Church, used this analogy to help explain our priorities in life and within the context of a healthy family. Checkout this aspect of the sermon below, and rewind to watch the whole message.

In the message above, he outlines how our priorities should be ordered and how they are life giving when first things are first. This is how he outlines them in the message.

How To Prioritize Your Life as a Christian:

1. Kingdom (Creator) – God is first 
2. Body (Temple) 
3. Marriage (Oneness) 
4. Family (parenting)
   1. Love & Obey Jesus 
   2. Family love is time 
   3. Tell the truth and keep your word
   4. Pay then play 
   5. Get past yourself 
   6. Gumption to grow
5. Work (Career) 
6. Finances (providing) 

The priority is important because they submit to the things ahead of them if there is a conflict. That is the whole reason for the order. If we have to choose one or the other, we have to choose the higher priority. This doesn’t mean it will be easy, but at least we have a structure for how to make these decisions.

Visualize Your Time So You Can Be Intentional

We all have the same time every day and it is up to each of us to steward and invest that time well. (Matthew 25:14-30) If we aren’t intentional about our time, it will run off easily. So once you have your rocks, gravel, and sand. Start putting it on your calendar in the proper order. As a Christian, God should get your first fruits. That means your first time, so He goes first. After that it might be something like family or spouse, then work or school. I like to use an online calendar so I can set up recurring events where I will set up blocks of time for each area of my rocks. If you use a paper planner, block it out there. This is a concept called time blocking, which I talked about earlier. 

Once you have your rocks set, you can put in some gravel and sand around the rocks. The goal should be that rocks aren’t moved by the sand, but give yourself grace if life happens. However, you must go back to the original plan and don’t let one time disruptions derail your rocks. 

The most important thing is that you don’t let God get replaced for the number one spot. If you do, then you idolize that rock over God. Also, know that God should be honored in all of your rocks, gravel, and sand, so don’t confine him to just a block of time. This is just a way to be intentional in your time. Without intentionality, you will never make progress at anything. All the knowledge in the world means nothing if you don’t intentionally turn that knowledge into action.

How I Break Down My Rocks, Gravel, and Sand

Rocks

1. God
2. Holly (My fiancé)
3. Family
4. Work
   1. Main Job
   2. Part-time Job

Gravel

1. Serving
2. Heath/Fitness
3. Professional Growth
4. Community
5. Reading
6. Working on my house and car as needed
7. Writing about faith (what you are reading)

Sand

1. Podcasts
2. AudioBooks
3. YouTube
4. Research into various areas I am curious about.

To be honest, I am far from doing this perfectly. A big example of where I haven’t done this well is choosing my family and work over my fiancé. A not as serious but still important example is spending too much time on YouTube. 

Where You Spend Your Time Tells You Where Your Heart Is

Time is your most rare resource, so like money where your treasure is, your heart will be also. (Matthew 6:21) Before you do this exercise, it is also important to self evaluate and look back on how your time has been used. Was it invested in the kingdom or just spent on chasing what the world has to offer? It is probably a bit of both. Our purpose in life is to be more like Jesus every day, so this means constantly aligning your life, priorities, time, and money to the kingdom—which is a lifeline process.

Questions to Ask Yourself to Grow

• Do you use your time to grow closer to God?
• Are you using your time to grow in your faith and personal holiness?
• Are you using your time to serve and disciple others? 
• Are the areas you just set as rocks present as much as you would like them to be in your time?
• Is your money spent in a way that aligns with your priorities?
• Does your phone screen time report align with your priorities?

Continue to self evaluate on those not to feel bad but to help you become the good steward God has entrusted you to be. Let me know in the comments what questions you ask yourself and if there is any way I can help.